Today, I am reminded about all the great marriages in my family and how only death parted them.
My grandparents on the Graham side were married for over 50 years before my grandpa left. Their marriage was rock solid. They still dated each other and could be found making out if you happened to walk into the house and they were not expecting you.
They had five exceptional children and gave us a legacy of never giving up on each other.
My parents were married for 47 years before my dad passed away. Their marriage had several ups and downs, but they did not give up on each other.
They had two amazing kids and worked hard at their marriage, trying to bring love and understanding into everything they did. There may have been times when they wanted to give up, but they never did. They worked through their problems and never gave up on themselves or us kids.
My Uncle Bob and Aunt Shirley are on my mom’s side. I don’t know how long they were married, but it was at least 40+ years. They were so cute together. You could see their love for each other in everything they did for each other. Uncle Bob passed away first, and Aunt Shirley was lost without him. They had four girls, and I can’t imagine that was easy, but they made it seem like a cakewalk.
Uncle Bill and Aunt Doreen were married again until my uncle passed away. I am unsure how long they were married, but if I had to guess, I would say at least 35+ years. They were always having a great time together. You could also see the love shining through them, as where one went, the other was there. I am sure every marriage had its ups and downs, but they stayed together. They had two beautiful children.
I could go on and on, but I think you get the drift.
Now there were some marriages that didn’t last but it was more the exception to the rule and sometimes you need to know when to walk away. You don’t need the toxic bleeding into the entire family.
The gifts from each of these marriages are:
· Marriage is work; you're either willing to work on it or not. One person can’t make the marriage work without the other.
· You have to be intentional about the marriage and with each other.
· Make you, the couple, a priority, then the kids. You can’t be there for the kids without a united front.
· Never bring other people into your marriage unless they are there to help you.
· Take the time to be there for each other.
· Make each day count.
· If it won't matter in 5 minutes, 5 weeks, or 5 years, why are you fighting about it?
· COMMUNICAITION is king!
The truth is each marriage we see can be a gift if we choose it to be. Each one gives us insight into what works and what doesn’t work for some.
I am blessed to have a lot of positive role models in my life to witness. I am blessed with the gift of seeing happy, successful marriages. And ones that knew that it would not work.
I am blessed to be part of many amazing people's lives, and I don’t take this gift lightly.
Can you think of a marriage in your family that you look up to? What is their marriage that made you think they have it all together?
I would love to hear your stories.
With love and gratitude,
Dorothy
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