The holidays can be rough, but here is how we can make them manageable.

Unspoken communications or miscommunications between you and your loved ones.

Kids are acting up or even making plans without letting you know.

Everyone wants to get that someone the perfect gift, the expectations of not screwing that up!

Did I get enough? Did I forget anything on my grocery list, no matter how many times I have gone to the store?

The lineups, the flare-ups, people not knowing that when you are in an aisle at the store and you see something on the other side, you DON'T leave your cart in the middle of the aisle and grab it.

You move it to the side, and you proceed. And don't even get me started on the people who stop in the middle of the aisle and talk to people they have not seen in years! I get it. You're excited, and you want to have a conversation! MOVE to the SIDE and let us people there to shop; move on!

And what about the family gatherings?

Who will show, who will blow, who will let go?

Is favorite Uncle Sam going to make it this year? Are cousins Tina and Rick going to get into a heated debate over who makes the best Jello mold? Is Aunt Susan going to pass gas for the 10th year in a row?

Inquiring minds want to know!

Then there are the loved ones who used to be here and make the holidays much more memorable; they have gained their wings and are looking over us from above. We miss their physical presence in our lives; sometimes, just having the memories is not enough.

Remember the good times; feel them in your heart. Bring up the stories they used to share and cherish the new memories made this new year.

When you feel overwhelmed and people start to get to you, take ten deep breaths, close your eyes, and focus on breathing.  If that doesn't help, excuse yourself and go for a walk.

The bottom line is that you need to ensure that you are okay; it will be fine that you have stepped away to take care of yourself. If you have young children, ask someone to watch them for the 20- 30 minutes you will be gone.

Trust me; they will survive without you while you take care of yourself; you will come back as a better person and be able to listen from a place of love instead of frustration and overwhelm. Chances are excellent that Great Aunt Sally will have loved the time with your littles. It will make her feel useful.

And most important of all, give yourself some grace. Things will not always turn out like you hoped, but it could be better if you allow them to! And just because you can doesn't mean you should!

Just because you can do it all doesn't mean you should. Allow people to help you, they may not do it like you would be it will get done! And this is also a gift for them that you allowed them to help. People may think you have it all together cause you never ask for help, but secretly, you think they should know that you need the help but don't want to ask.

Girlfriend! No one is a mind reader; allow the holidays to be what they are. Enjoy your loved ones, enjoy the new memories, and take pictures when you can to reflect and think that it was not so bad after all.

I pray this helped you in some small way! And I would love to hear your holiday stories and see some pictures!

Merry Christmas! From our house to yours!