Mine did almost 2.5 years ago. I watch my husband and my brother carry my father out of the house onto a stretcher and into a body bag.
I watched the car drive out of the court and I remember thinking at least his pain is gone, his suffering is done.
As the days went by and life moved on, I remember thinking to myself wow time stands still for no one.
I just lost my hero. He might not have understood me all the time, but he always made time for me. I would always call him on my way home from work, just to see how his day was and get his words of wisdom.
What these two and a half years have taught me is I was being refined.
I didn’t even realize till just recently that I was doing things in such a counterproductive way.
Our parents may teach us their way of being, but that doesn’t make it wrong or right, just what is.
My dad’s way of being was to work hard, work for someone else, collect your pension, and retire.
My Grandma’s way of being was to get married, do anything and everything to make your man happy, and take care of your man.
The tape that I had running in my background then led me to believe that work hard, don’t take any time for yourself, don’t ask for help, take care of everyone, and at all costs keep the peace no matter what.
Which led to decades of being a workaholic, putting everyone first. Enabling other's behaviors and never sticking up for myself.
Till now.
The last two and a half years have been intense. Intense cleaning of the tapes.
Intense moments of fear, doubt, shame, guilt, worry.
And we all know what you focus on you get more of.
So, I got more of that.
I was working hard trying to figure out a business I knew nothing about, not getting the proper help I needed, and stressing myself out to the point of burnout for the 2nd time in my life. All the while making others more of a priority than me.
I realized something needed to change; God stepped in.
He made me realize that I was still playing the old tapes.
I wasn’t worthy, I’ll never succeed in business, what makes you think you can change the world? Why would people listen to you? Who do you think you are?
What I know is this, I am because I say I am.
My life circumstances have put me in a position to now help other people.
I did not go through all I went through for nothing. Everything I have done and been through is so that I can help other people.
What I know is we get to choose.
We get to say how our life goes.
How I see it is, I am in the 3rd period of the Superbowl, 3rd down getting ready to throw the ball to my TE so they can grab it and run it into the end zone.
I am leaning on my decades of training and life experiences to get me into the next period of the game.
I started Operation H.O.P.E because I know what it's like to be down and out. To feel discouraged in life to not go after things because fear is a liar.
I was put on this earth to make a massive impact to help women know they are never alone, to see their worth, and to step fully into their destiny without fear, guilt, or shame all the while having fun.
If this sounds like you and you're ready for change hit me up!
I can’t wait to talk to you and see how we can change the world together.
